Weeks 39 and 40 and. . .Still Pregnant
Every time I read this post, I think I should delete it all and just have happy smiling pregnancy photos of myself. But I just can’t bring myself to do it. So, probably you should just skip this and go read something about kittens and baby polar bears. Consider yourself warned.
It is really hard not to get grumpy about having an overdue baby.
Not because you are mentally thinking you should already have a baby (I was somewhat prepared for a late baby after Ella’s birth, eight days after her due date), although it’s not exactly pleasant to still be pregnant in a month you were truly hoping you would NOT be pregnant in.
But because your entire life becomes about the fact that you HAVE NOT HAD THE BABY YET. Every text message is asking where your baby is (safely inside my apparently way-too-hospitable womb). Every conversation is about how if I’d just take a long walk, I’d go immediately into labor (no. I will not. I went for a four-mile brisk walk yesterday with a couple of friends and didn’t have a single solitary contraction). Everyone is asking why my doctor won’t just induce me on my due date (because a due date is not like a stone marker of when your baby is ready to be born).
And, look, I know, logically, everyone means well and is just excited, blah, blah, blah, and not trying to make me tear out my hair with their “helpful” suggestions about how to put yourself into labor (my strong medical opinion is that you cannot put yourself into labor. If your body is ready to have a baby, you can do things that might move things along, but you cannot just force your body to go from “totally not ready” to “grab the bags and let’s head to the hospital” by virtue of spicy food/pineapple/castor oil/sex/walking/running-up-stairs). Logically, I recognize that everyone’s questions and comments about this baby and her late arrival are well-meaning. But it’s pretty hard for me to feel logical about this when the barrage is never-freaking-ending.
Are you feeling so incredibly sorry for Bart who has to live with me ranting endlessly about this? You should be.
The moral of the story is, I will clearly never be one of those women with a 40 week picture where I’m holding a newborn.
On Friday, when I hit 41 weeks, this baby will be induced.
And then I shall have a little tattoo done on my arm to remind me to never ever speak to an overdue woman unless it is to suggest we go out to lunch.
I totally agree with your medical opinion. I tell friends they can try working their uterus reflexology point, but it's only going to help if their body is already ready to go into labor. I don't believe anything will spur labor before the body wants to go itself.
I also hate doctors who tell women "it could be any time now!" Don't get their hopes up early, you jerk! Tell them their body will go when it's ready and be prepared for the long haul, in case it takes that long! That way, the poor pregnant mom is not sitting around waiting for labor and getting mad at you and the world that they're not laboring yet. (You would think that with how many pregnant women ob's see every day, they would have figured this out by now….why is it that they haven't?)
I was overdue with my second after having my first right on her due date, and my midwife telling me "she's coming any day now" FOR A MONTH, so I can definitely sympathize. Hang in there… the baby can't stay in there forever. :o)
I remember feeling certifiably insane after about 38 weeks. Those last few weeks are so tough! Hang in there. And you look fabulous, by the way. Absolutely lovely.
Oh Janssen – wish there were some way to bring a baby when you wanted her, but I fear you're correct. I hope you go into labor on your way to the induction, like I did with Shannon. Or even better, go into labor tonight right after your daughter goes to sleep. Your sister comes up to stay with her, you have a one hour labor, and three pushes later, you've got your December baby! We'll be praying for that option.
My babies have both been a week "early" so I don't get the labor inducing tips, but I get comments every single day from people telling me how HUGE they think I look. From complete strangers, even. What kills is that I measure right on. I'm short and small people, give me a break! So what I do, and what might work for you, is to stare blankly at the person who is making annoying/offensive/ridiculous comments, throw in a few slow, "are you freaking serious?!" blinks and then turn and walk away. Then there will be one less obnoxious person you want to punch in the face, because they don't usually make the same mistaken comments again. Good luck!
You look fantastic, as always! And yay – Friday sounds like a GREAT day to have a baby!!!
I am now going to email you.
No, 40 weeks already? You don't look a day past 36! Sorry for the very very unfunny joke, but in all seriousness you are very lovely Janssen, inside and out. I hope this superabundance of sympethetic mothers will buoy your spirits! (At least until Friday) Then I'll bring you, and your family of FOUR, lunch!
My doctor decided with baby K to show some mercy and induce me the weekend before Christmas (due date was 23rd, he came on the 22nd) so I could be home with E and my family. This was earlier than 41 weeks. Greatest idea ever. I was ok with having baby come on his own, but I was glad she was thinking clearly because I wasn't. Anyways, sorry about the waiting game and the comments. You do look like the baby has dropped so good signs right? Hang in there. The end is the hardest mostly because of the inability to sleep and heartburn and sciatica. Thinking of you!
You look amazing, as always! And I know the feeling – Noah was 5 days overdue and it was awful. But then there was Lucy, so….
I hope baby gets here before your induction! Although, since it's already late Wednesday night, I doubt that will happen. You still look great!
Also, the other day I was wondering how you were and thought about tweeting at you. Then I remembered being past 40 weeks pregnant and came to my senses.
So sorry about the barrage of comments about whether you've had your baby yet. I don't think I've ever peppered someone who's overdue with questions, but I definitely will just send her a gift or take her to lunch instead. 🙂
At least you're still smiling in the pictures…..even if you're not smiling on the inside. 🙂 (Had 2 over due babies myself – it blows.)
Oh man, I feel for you. I was not a pleasant person those last few days. I wanted to respond to all those text messages with "The baby arrived last week! I guess I forgot to tell you?"
If you were closer to Portland, I would bring you some spicy shrimp tacos with Por Que No, which I ate 3 times the week that Henry was born. They probably had nothing to do with going into labor but they were very, very tasty.
xo
I'll admit, I Facebook stalked you to see if you had already had the baby but hadn't posted here about it yet. Haha! But I wasn't going to say anything about it. I have the feeling I'll be in your shoes in about a month (I'm measuring small, so I am gearing myself up to go a week overdue).
I got induced with Molly at 41 weeks. Blah. Longest week of my life!! Good Luck and Love ya!! So excited for you!!
Aw, Janssen. You honey. I'm glad you posted this.
You might remember I went to 42 weeks with both of my girls. I actually don't mind that part at all (oddly), the only part that annoys me is that EVERYONE ELSE MINDS SO DARN MUCH! So I relate to that part of your post, for sure.
My plan with this one is to be very vague about when I'm due…perhaps name only the season or month, maybe it'll help. I might even overshoot so that when baby does arrive it's a surprise. Na, probably won't work, I tell people, "Ah, I go over, so I'll be *my* full term a couple weeks later."
P.S. You look amazing. And I know nothing I saw helps.
i love you. you make me laugh. i felt like i was having a conversation with you at the park while watching our kids play while reading this post. thanks for being such a great writer. it's just gosh darn fun to read. 🙂
Hey Janssen,
I hope that whenever this baby comes,both mama and baby sail through the delivery. 🙂 There is nothing that ever makes me rant more than people presuming that they have a right to know everything about someone else's pregnancy and have a right to tell the woman how to go about handling her pregnancy. You and this baby will be ready for the next part of your adventure when you are both ready. It is as simple as that. 🙂 Hugs to you!
Today's the day! Hope everything goes smoothly for you!