Weeks 39 and 40 and. . .Still Pregnant
Every time I read this post, I think I should delete it all and just have happy smiling pregnancy photos of myself. But I just can’t bring myself to do it. So, probably you should just skip this and go read something about kittens and baby polar bears. Consider yourself warned. Â
It is really hard not to get grumpy about having an overdue baby.
Not because you are mentally thinking you should already have a baby (I was somewhat prepared for a late baby after Ella’s birth, eight days after her due date), although it’s not exactly pleasant to still be pregnant in a month you were truly hoping you would NOT be pregnant in.
But because your entire life becomes about the fact that you HAVE NOT HAD THE BABY YET. Every text message is asking where your baby is (safely inside my apparently way-too-hospitable womb). Every conversation is about how if I’d just take a long walk, I’d go immediately into labor (no. I will not. I went for a four-mile brisk walk yesterday with a couple of friends and didn’t have a single solitary contraction). Everyone is asking why my doctor won’t just induce me on my due date (because a due date is not like a stone marker of when your baby is ready to be born).
And, look, I know, logically, everyone means well and is just excited, blah, blah, blah, and not trying to make me tear out my hair with their “helpful” suggestions about how to put yourself into labor (my strong medical opinion is that you cannot put yourself into labor. If your body is ready to have a baby, you can do things that might move things along, but you cannot just force your body to go from “totally not ready” to “grab the bags and let’s head to the hospital” by virtue of spicy food/pineapple/castor oil/sex/walking/running-up-stairs). Logically, I recognize that everyone’s questions and comments about this baby and her late arrival are well-meaning. But it’s pretty hard for me to feel logical about this when the barrage is never-freaking-ending.
Are you feeling so incredibly sorry for Bart who has to live with me ranting endlessly about this? You should be.
The moral of the story is, I will clearly never be one of those women with a 40 week picture where I’m holding a newborn.
On Friday, when I hit 41 weeks, this baby will be induced.
And then I shall have a little tattoo done on my arm to remind me to never ever speak to an overdue woman unless it is to suggest we go out to lunch.
Poor you! Don't apologize for being grumpy… I can only imagine how you're feeling. And I enjoy reading a good rant now and then 🙂
Don't forget trampolines! I got the suggestion that I jump on a trampoline when I was overdue. I didn't try it and neither should you.
It is my belief that every DAY of being overdue is like another 40 weeks to the pregnant mom.
Good luck! Thanks for writing. This stuff NEEDS to be said.
I know nothing about being pregnant, so I generally try to avoid offering advice. But I will take a mental note about offering lunch to an overdue pregnant friend, that seems like a good route to go.
Good luck. I hope you get un-pregnant soon.
I read a great newspaper article by a woman who was about as far along as you are right now. She said there are only three things you are allowed to say to a pregnant woman at any stage. I can only remember two of them: 1.Would you like to sit down? and 2. Would you like a cookie? The third was along those lines. I've got to look it up. It was perfect.
Oh man. I was wondering but I was not about to ask. I think you should spend two days doing everything indulgent. Forget about cooking and routine. Have some hot chocolate at the bookstore and read all their books instead of yours. And take Ella to the park and silently guilt the other moms into watching her so you don't have to get up. And maybe a half dozen or more episodes of whatever you love on Netflix.
So sorry. Want to go to lunch? 😉
amen. I actually skipped church the Sunday before my due date and the Sunday after because I couldn't take one more "oh you poor thing" comment or look.
When I worked for an obstetrician, I never allowed women who were less than nine months pregnant to say they were "hanging in there", but you are officially "hanging in there" and still looking fabulous! Be consoled by the fact that about thirty years ago they would not induce until someone was about three weeks overdue!
Meanwhile, enjoy another day with that adorable only child!
So… How's the weather? 😉
Aw, well I hope that when the time comes it all goes smoothly!
I feel your pain. Forrest was over a week late, too, and I was going crazy towards the end . . . not because I was desperate for him to be born (although it was, as you know, a little discouraging to keep wondering and waiting), but mostly because I couldn't wait for a conversation that wouldn't revolve around, "You're STILL pregnant? Have you tried _______ ?" The only positive for me was having a close friend who was a massage therapist who offered to give me massages until he was born, with special focus on the pressure points that are supposed to help move things along. Honestly, I'm not sure if I'm convinced that it did anything (I 100% agree with you–I think if your body is ready, you'll go into labor; if it's not, that's that, sorry), but it was nice to have that one friend who actually offered to do something sweet instead of just texting each day with, "Well?! Where is he?" I hope you have at least one of those friends in your arsenal! Good luck.
When I was 40 weeks with my second, a friend jokingly suggested I post a picture of my bump with an eviction notice taped to my belly. The eviction date was my scheduled induction. Baby came two days before its eviction. You could do the same for your pre-induction picture, if she hangs on that long.
I think you can also say things like "wow, you're pretty" because that's what I'd say to you if I saw/texted you.
I'm sorry Janssen. Hopefully she comes safely and soonish.
You look beautiful btw – love the outfits.
I understand!! My babies were ALWAYS 'late' and the texts and calls- yeah- and I would have contractions for WEEKS before (like 2 weeks) and no baby- so I feel for ya! hang in there- you look beautiful! )
I poem and wish for a fast and easy delivery.
"The Ninth Month"
by Carol Lyn Pearson
Being a duplex,
I have been happy, my dear,
To loan you half the house.
Rent-free and furnished
as best I could.
You have been a good
Tenant, all in all,
Quiet, yet comfortably there.
Tapping friendly on the wall.
But I hear
You have outgrown the place
And are packing up to move.
Well, I will miss
The sweet proximity.
But we will keep in touch.
There are bonds, my dear,
That reach beyond a block,
Or a mile, or a hemisphere,
Born of much love and labor.
I approve the move,
And gladly turn from landlady
To neighbor.
I think I love you. My husband and I have actually lied and/or been extremely vague about my due date in anticipation of this. Hang in there! You look absolutely beautiful. Wishing you a safe and healthy birth!
"A poem" sorry
So sorry! I totally knowhow youare feeling. Everyday you go past your due date feels like an extra month of pregnancy. Hang in there!
Even though we don't *really* know each other, I sure do like you!!! This post made me laugh- it is nice to read about how normal feelings of frustration are when the baby doesn't show up right on time, like a package from Amazon. Mine were both late and I chose to be induced. Best wishes for a rockin couple of days before the bebe is there. 🙂