One Year of Homeschooling

We’re wrapping up our year of homeschooling next week and I cannot believe how quickly this year has flown by!

Although this wasn’t our first foray into homeschooling, it was definitely a big change to have everyone homeschooling this year (Ella part-time as she attended a few classes at our local high school and the other three girls full-time).

I asked what questions people had about our year of homeschooling and there was a LOT of curiosity!

If you’d like more details about what this year looked like and our plans going forward, this post is for you!

Why did you choose to homeschool?
The main reason is that last summer our girls, seemingly out of nowhere, asked if we could homeschool this coming year. After some pressing over several weeks, it became clear they were really set on doing it, so we dove in.

Also, I was homeschooled growing up (K-8 full-time and then part-time through high school) and Ella had done homeschool in kindergarten and 1st grade and then part-time since 6th grade (more details about hybrid schooling here), so I was very familiar with homeschooling and not intimidated by it.

And, earlier that spring, while Bart and I were home alone eating lunch and all our kids were at school, he’d asked me what I would do with my time if I didn’t work and I surprised myself by saying “I think I’d homeschool.” Having done both homeschool and public school, I was well aware of how much time is wasted at school and how much more efficiently you can get through the same (or more!) material at home.

Plus the girls had lots of friends in the neighborhood who homeschooled, so it was definitely in the water for them.

Basically, all these things came together at just the right moment to push us into homeschooling this year.

CURRICULUM/TEACHING: 

Are you switching up any of your curriculum from what you did this year?
I wasn’t thrilled with how science went this year – we did a local science class which was fairly mediocre especially for the older girls who I pulled out at Christmas. They did Kahn Academy the rest of the year which they both strongly preferred and next year one of the moms in our neighborhood invited us to join her kids for science as long as we bought the supplies, which I’m THRILLED to do.

How did you choose curriculum? 
I like a mix of curriculum – my mom did the same. For me, it feels not fun to pick one curriculum provider and just do everything from them. Here’s what we used this year.

Making the leap next year! How to pick curriculum for our family? Feels overwhelming.
The good news is that there are lots of good options. Choose something and if you don’t love it, you can adjust or do something new the next year.

What are your priorities for homeschool?
My biggest priority is for my kids to love learning and to foster a lifelong sense of curiosity, plus a sense that they can learn anything they want to with or without formal education.

I also want them to be well-read, to have a solid understanding of geography and history, and be very proficient in math.

I am a bilingual lawyer and do not feel qualified to teach science, math or even Spanish. How do you feel confident you can teach so many subjects? 
Three things (and I think this is a very common feeling!) First, I’m more than happy to bring someone in to teach subjects I don’t want to do myself. We hired a Chinese tutor so my girls could keep up their Mandarin, my older girls do math with my mother-in-law, and my younger girls did Savvy.

Second, my goal is for my kids to learn HOW to learn not so much that they learn every fact about every subject. And homeschool is a great opportunity for my kids to see this in action – if we’re going to learn about a country, we check out books from the library, watch a documentary, find it on a map, talk to people who have lived there and in other ways figure out how to learn about something we’re interested in. I’m happy to learn along with them and I don’t feel like I have to know everything beforehand to teach it to them. In fact, one thing I’ve heard from homeschool parents over and over again (including my mom) is that they learn as much or more in homeschool as their kids do. And by the way, this happens in academics all the time – a professor decides they want to teach a new class or subject and they dive in and learn enough to design a class around it. My father-in-law was a humanities professor and 30 years into his career became a subject expert, teacher and writer on something completely unrelated to his PhD and previous teaching and research experience.

Third, my kids have had PLENTY of brand-new first year teachers in their public school education. I guarantee you that the 22 year old teaching third grade is not a subject matter expert in biology or Native American history – they have a curriculum that they follow and they’re learning as they go too! Absolutely I have the ability to do the same.

Continuing with Chinese dual immersion – can it be done? 
So far, I feel like it is going pretty well. I’m guessing they aren’t making AS much progress as they would with 3-4 hours a day of immersion but they also get one-on-one instruction so I think it’s mostly coming out in the wash. My goal is for them to be strong enough to do the immersion program in middle school (Ella did it and the teacher is phenomenal).

Since all of your girls are now strong readers, do they complete work on their own?
Yes! I think there is a common feeling among people who aren’t familiar with homeschool that homeschool is the parent there with the child every moment of the homeschool day and I think that is probably pretty rare. One of the best parts of homeschool is the opportunity for a child to do more self-directed learning (plus it’s not like the teacher is there by your child’s side every moment of the day in public school either).

Are your girls still enrolled in Savvy? 
Tally still does Savvy Reading and Savvy Math. Star did Savvy Math most of the year until she topped out at the end of the 5th grade curriculum this spring.

Do you do a co-op? 
No. We did a co-op preschool for a few of our kids and frankly I just don’t love it. It always feels stressful and inconvenient to me. I know it’s a great fit for some families, but I have basically zero interest.

PROS/CONS/CHANGE:

Tell us the good, the bad, and then the good again! It can be a roller coaster sometimes! What went well and what would you like to improve on for next year?
Overall, I felt like it went really smoothly. Obviously some days were a bit easier than others, but overall it didn’t actually feel like a roller coaster, in large part because my girls are a bit older AND they really wanted to homeschool.

Does it get easier? I have two homeschooling (5 and 7) and 3, 1 and almost newborn.
I think definitely! Juggling tiny babies and a bunch of young children who need a lot more help than older kids is NO JOKE. (That’s one reason I feel great about not having homeschooled until this year).

What do your girls say are their highs and lows from this year’s homeschooling experience? 
Ella (9th grade): Highs: weekly nature study with friends, being able to go to the gym with me or play pickleball in the morning. Lows: Having a lot of school work and homeschool work to do – the other girls would all be done much earlier and she’d have a lot to still finish.

Ani (6th grade): Highs: having more time to do my own things and to do school subjects in the order I wanted each day. Lows: having less time to just hang out with friends without having to plan it ahead of time.

Star (4th grade): Highs: Weekly nature study, finishing school earlier every day than if she went to public school, creative writing, history and poetry Lows: Language Arts

Tally (2nd grade): Highs: Doing Savvy Math and Savvy Reading. Low: Creative Writing

How do you help your kids learn to work well with other, especially those who are hard to work with? 
The good news is that when you have siblings that you’re around all day long, you get a lot of practice working well with other people, including ones who are hard to work with! Also, one of the best ways for kids to learn to work with other kids is through unstructured play where adults aren’t guiding the whole thing and my kids get TONS of opportunity to do this in our neighborhood.

What has been the most challenging part for you?
I’d say the most challenging part for me has been accepting that my schedule has to be more fluid than my naturally Type-A personality wants. It’s actually been really good practice for me to be a little more flexible and handle changes in my schedule day after day.

Are any of your kids easier to homeschool than others? 
I have a few that get frustrated more easily than others but they continue to get better at handling it and I usually just give them a bit of time to cool off and then they come back ready to dive back in.

Do your kids like homeschool?
They LOVE it. In fact, about three months in to homeschool, one of my daughters pulled me aside and said, “I can’t believe we used to go to public school and think it was okay.” That was the moment I knew it was unlikely anyone was going back to school full time.

How do you teach conflict resolution/teamwork/diversity?
. . . .isn’t this exactly what living in a family and having siblings teaches you? Also they play constantly with other neighborhood friends and that kind of non-adult run play is a prime way to learn how to resolve conflict and work together with people who aren’t the same as you.

Was there anything your girls missed about going to school or the school experience? 
Ella (9th grade) said she feels like she knows less people overall at her high school because she doesn’t attend very many classes. She also doesn’t love that she only goes to lunch at school every other day.

Ani (6th grade) said the main thing she misses is meeting new people as her classes change each year.

Star (4th grade) said the main thing she misses is her best friend that she spent tons of time with last year in school but she says she loves playing with her homeschool friends too.

Tally (2nd grade) said the main thing she missed was friends.

Did kids (or you) fight more being together so much? 
No – I think there is often a little bit of an adjustment in the summer or over school breaks to siblings being together all day long, but because they never went back to school this past fall, there wasn’t a big adjustment after summer.

Is your house a lot messier with everyone home all day? 
A bit but I care a lot about a clean house and when everyone is coming in for lunch, I make sure everyone puts away their school baskets and laptops and other school supplies so that there isn’t stuff everywhere all afternoon long. I’d say overall, no more than 5% more messy than it was when everyone went to school.

What changed/stayed the same from what you planned in August and how it’s turned out? 
I’d say it actually went pretty according to plan! The main thing was pulling the big girls out of the local science class at Christmas because it was such a fail for them.

What have been your favorite benefits?
Frankly, I love having everyone home! I love eating lunch together, I love that my girls aren’t so worn out by the afternoon (my mom used to say she didn’t want school having the best hours of her kids’ days and I totally get that!), and I love that they can do extracurricular things without it eating up every free moment. And most of all, I love that they don’t waste so much time.

Do you regret not doing it sooner? My first is entering kindergarten and I have twin babies, feeling too overwhelmed. 
I don’t! We homeschooled when Ella was in 1st grade which is when Tally was born and with four little kids 6 and under, I can imagine the overwhelm you feel. I really feel like this past year was the first year I could reasonably homeschool without losing my mind and I have no regrets that they went to public school until now.

What peaceful or happy surprises have you discovered about homeschooling? 
I’ve LOVED not dealing with the madness of the end of school. We still have some events (like the end of year art show or violin recital) but it is nothing compared to juggling 3 elementary schoolers with field trips, parties, and performances. I haven’t had an April or May this calm in years.

What are you changing, adding, adjusting? 
Next year, I’m planning to do a reading list for each girl of books I’d like them to read either outside of school hours or during family reading. I’m also planning to get my full list of poets and artists for the year so I don’t have to scramble for that each week. I need to figure out a new language arts situation for Ani who has not loved The Good and the Beautiful.

SCHEDULE:

How many hours a day/week do you spend preparing, and teaching/hands on? 
I spend 1-2 hours a day doing school with the girls and maybe 30-60 minutes a week preparing.

Can you show me the flow of your day for you and your kids? Daily rhythms for you all.
I did a Day in the Life post this fall – you can see it here!

How do you fit in work time? 
Honestly, this has been the biggest growth area for me. It’s very easy for me to feel like if it’s not a huge block of time or uninterrupted that I can’t get what I need to done. This year has been very helpful for me to learn to be more flexible and more efficient. Generally I work for about an hour in the morning while the girls do their Chinese tutoring and before I go for a run/walk or go to my gym class or to play pickleball. Then I work for an hour or two between doing morning kickoff/history with the girls and family reading. Then my biggest work chunk is between lunch and when I start making dinner around 5 p.m.

How do you do group lessons and cater to different levels of learning? 
We only do history, geography, poetry, and artists all together and those all feel easy to do as a group without having to cater to different levels (by the way, remember that in public school you have multiple levels going on in every classroom ALWAYS – Ella was reading at a college level as a kindergartener, so it’s not like every child in a 2nd grade classroom at school is right at the same level).

How many hours a day did your girls actively work in home school?
I’d say about 4 hours a day. They were pretty much done by lunch every day.

Are you going to take a long “traditional break” or shorter break and then continue sooner?
We stick to the public school schedule (because Ella is attending public school part-time and Ani will be doing the same this fall for middle school). Plus lots of their extracurriculars like art and piano follow the regular school schedule, so it’s easier for us to just follow that. And, of course, we’re not afraid to miss some school for mid-year travels!

FRIENDS:

Have friendships shifted for your family as a whole?
Our neighborhood has a robust group of homeschool families and although we were all friends before (including going on trips together!), I now spend more time with them on a regular basis for Nature Study or other activities we attend together since we’re all home during the day.

My kids have been at same school since kindergarten. So k-7 for son and k-5 for daughter. I’m worried they will lose some of those friendships if we homeschool. 
To be honest, you might. Star had a best friend last year that she played with almost every single day and now they get together maybe once a month (or less). That’s just life – most of us probably aren’t still close friends with everyone we ever were good friends with thanks to moves, schedule changes, and growing up.

We have really struggled with the social aspect. How do you include time and activities with their peers?
We try to have some peer activities built-in to our weekly schedule. All our girls have a church group during the week, they all attend art classes with peers, they went to a community science class once a week, and we have weekly Nature Study with the homeschool families in our community where we eat lunch and visit and explore outside. If I wanted more, we would join a co-op, set up standing play dates with other families, attend more library events (including the homeschool group meetup our library hosts) or join a sports team.

Do you (honestly) feel like your kids are getting less socialization? Is it good/bad? 
Nooooooo. I think my children are getting MORE socialization this year. Our neighborhood has a bunch of homeschool families and my girls play with friends literally every day for hours. They play street hockey and Calico Critters and ride bikes and make mud bakeries and paint their nails and jump on the trampoline and so much more. Bart and I say every day that our girls are absolutely living their best life right now.

16 year old has no friends at school. Even harder to make friends when homeschooling a teen? 
Not necessarily. Most areas have strong homeschool communities and if public school isn’t providing a good social experience, this is a great chance to try something else and see if it works better (and since your child has no friends, you have basically nothing to lose socially). Check out Facebook groups or the library or Google to see what homeschool groups and communities exist in your area.

Do your kids miss their friends? 
A bit but it is something they almost never mention. I think people forget how NOT social much of school is – the main times you’re really doing things with your friends is at lunch and recess, but not very much during instruction time. I think back to my public school experience and remember that I had classes with people for literal years on end that I never spoke to or knew beyond their name. My friends were who I ate lunch with, had daily theater practice with or knew from my neighborhood or church. And we’ve tried hard to maintain the friendships the girls WANT to maintain – they have friends over for movie nights or to hang out in the afternoons or weekends. 

MOTIVATION:

We want to homeschool but my daughter has a hard time motivating herself. What helps you? 
One, my kids all know that if they can’t do their school work, they can go right back to public school. That’s pretty motivating for them!

Two, they don’t have to decide every day what they’re going to do for school – it’s clearly laid out what needs to be done every day and they can see on their charts how they’re doing.

Three, playing with friends, doing their own projects, etc are all predicated on them getting their school work done so they don’t WANT to spend the whole day meandering through their spelling words or writing projects.

I think you might be surprised when your child has more ownership over their schedule than they do in school that they are very capable of getting things done.

And if there are specific subjects that are the problem (say, math), consider getting a tutor or someone else to keep them on track.

HOMESCHOOLING IN HIGHSCHOOL/ PREPPING FOR COLLEGE

How to get started – I may be homeschooling my daughter if she doesn’t get into a particular junior high.
If you can, find someone local who you can ask questions. Look for a Facebook group or see if your library hosts something or just Google your area and homeschool groups. Finding real parents to talk to about details is wildly helpful! Also, the Internet is a treasure trove of good ideas – frankly, the problem now is TOO many options.

How did you prepare/are your girls preparing for college?
College prep is really not that complicated – you want good grades in the classes you do take in high school, a stellar ACT/SAT score, the ability to write some good essays, and some interesting things you’ve done to set yourself as an applicant. Personally, I don’t see it as that different than if they were going to public school full-time.

Will your kids graduate? And if so, how do you get credit? 
I can’t say what my younger kids will do but currently Ella does not plan to graduate and so she’ll only have some high school credits. Some states let you issue a homeschool diploma but I care zero about this.

What was your own/is Ella’s high school experience like? Tying to plan for my 9th grade homeschooler. 
Honestly, many of my friends had no idea I didn’t go to high school full-time. I went to my classes and then I went home while they went to other classes and how would they have even known without me telling them that I wasn’t just across the building in another classroom? Then I’d come back in the afternoon for play practice (I was VERY into theater as a high schooler and had parts in virtually every performance all four years). Ella’s is pretty similar – she goes for her classes, stays for lunch on the days her schedule allows it, hangs out with friends on the weekends, and goes to some after-school events that interest her.

Thoughts on how to do homeschool for a high schooler that is not just online classes?
That type of homeschool is not for me – Ella has done a few online classes and they were very unimpressive. I’d look to see if there are community homeschool classes you can do or for homeschool curriculum that’s not online. The main thing I think about is “what skills and knowledge do I want my child to finish high school with” and then start looking at ways to get those.

How do you navigate graduation/college with homeschooling? 
This was heartbreaking to most of my friends in high school when they discovered this as we finished our senior years, but you don’t need a high school diploma to get into almost any college or university (plus virtually no one has a diploma when they apply for college ANYWAY). You just apply as a homeschool student, which pretty much every school is set up to accept. If your child already has schools in mind, you can look at their applications for homeschoolers and see what they’ll want from you.

I applied to college with the grades I did have (I had 17 classes I took in high school and had a 4.0 GPA), my ACT score, and then my normal college essays and application. Got in no problem with a four year full-tuition scholarship.

Remember that there is a huge difference between being a homeschooler who didn’t take enough credits to graduate and being a high school dropout who just quit.

I’m super curious about the hybrid school your oldest does. 
I have a whole post about hybrid public/home school here!

COST/REGULATIONS/TESTING:

How do you understand the laws?
They differ by state so I can’t speak for anywhere else, but Utah is very low-key. You go in to the district office, fill out a form saying that you’re homeschooling and then drop a copy at your local school so they know your child won’t be attending. Other than that, Utah does not care what you do for homeschool. (Nevada was the same when I was growing up – they did away with the expensive end-of-year testing when I was maybe in 4th grade or so and after that you could do whatever you wanted with no oversight).

Do you measure their progress?
Yes, but not with testing – because I’m with them all day every day, it is pretty clear to me where they’re doing well and where we need to work more.

How much more do you think it costs from public school? 
It varies SO MUCH. You could homeschool for virtually no dollars by using free online resources and books at the library or you could spend a fortune. We pay for a Chinese tutor, Savvy math and reading, art classes for all four girls, music lessons for all four girls (which we would have done with or without homeschooling) and the science class my girls attended. The homeschool funding we can get through Utah can cover LOTS of that for next year.

Do you get homeschooling funds from the state? Some states will do that, and more should! 
Utah does have programs that allow this. We didn’t use them this year, but I think we will this coming year.

What does your homeschool house set up look like? We don’t have a ton of space. 
We have a buffet in our dining room and each girl has a basket to hold their school supplies plus the laptops are stored in there. (You can see the baskets and what they have in them here). I also have a basket that I keep my homeschooling stuff in my office and that’s it!

Any other questions about homeschool this year? I’m happy to help!

If you liked this post about how our first full year of homeschooling went, you might also like these other posts:

• Things Keeping Me Organized for Homeschool