Twilight. The Movie.

Oh, if you did not expect this post, you know nothing about me.

I spent the first half of the movie composing my blog post. And it was going to start like this: “I tried. I really tried. I’m sorry, but I never was able to buy Robert Pattinson as Edward.”

Fortunately, I changed my mind, and by the end I thought he did an excellent job. But people. It took me OVER AN HOUR to stop rolling my eyes at him. And um, those weren’t my eyes rolling back in my head as I swooned over him. They were eyes rolling with irritation and disbelief. He was just so. . . annoying. And makeup-y. And weird voice-y.

And then, after he showed Bella his sparkly skin and his tree running ability, etc., and they showed up together and he was smirking that Edward smirk all over the place, declaring that he was breaking all the rules anyway, so why not have a little fun, I made a 180 degree turn and suddenly he was a terrific Edward. I’m a fickle one, I realize.

Kristen Stewart, on the other hand, has made me nervous from the day I first saw her cast. The previews made her sound like a mouth-breathing idiot, but I loved her from the first moment she was on screen. She was all Bella to me; I liked her even more than the Bella of the book. She was fantastic. She is my biggest fan.

And Jacob, of course, despite being approximately one foot too short, was hilariously perfect. Even with hair twice as long as mine, he was delightful and sweet and funny. I can’t wait to see him in the next movies.

And Charlie. Well, Charlie was fantastically wonderfully awesome. I couldn’t get enough of his character. The scene with the gun just had me in hysterics.

When Edward came on screen for the first time, Ralphie and I screamed like banshees, just because we could. What else do you do on opening night? And the the girl next to me loudly made snide remarks to her neighbor about how loud we were and how, oh my gosh, they better not do that the whole movie, cause, it’s like, so annoying. It took all my willpower not to turn to her and sweetly tell her to shut it.

The movie was also surprisingly funny. I laughed many a time. The prom scene warmed my heart with its cuteness (and the Iron and Wine song, which I lurve). Emmett was perfectly, perfectly cast. Mike was surprisingly charming. Renee was Nina! The Port Angeles scene, my favorite scene in the whole book, was pulled off with aplomb. Bella has a Mac!

One big huge horrible negative though, was summed up in two words by Kayla: “Pancake Makeup.” Oh my heavens, seriously half of my issues with Edward early on were based on the plum colored lipstick and the powder covered beard (the other half may have been the world’s ugliest and most poorly fitting gray pea coat).

Anyway, overall I really enjoyed the movie. It was fun to go with a big group of friends and even more fun to stand around for over thirty minutes afterward discussing our favorite parts and our least favorite parts.

And now I can get down to the serious business of talking everyone’s ear off about it. That kind of work doesn’t do itself, you know.

(Yes, I wrote this post at one a.m. What of it?)